Summer and 4th of July

Fresh Start Momentum is on Summer break. Hope you are too!

Stay tuned for special 4th of July post!

How To Build an Amazing Journey

Grand Canyon in Arizona

 In America, we have some of the most magnificent sites and they are not just for tourists from around the world who visit. Americans would be wise to see these attractions themselves so they can have first-hand knowledge of their own country. The Grand Canyon in Arizona is one of those amazing places.

There simply is nothing like this Canyon. On average, 4.5 million visitors annually are attracted to this extra large “hole” in the ground that measures 277 miles long, up to 18 miles wide and over a mile deep.

The staff at curiosity.com says, “The water from ALL the world’s rivers would only fill the Grand Canyon halfway! You can actually see the Grand Canyon from space. . .The river that carved the Grand Canyon is the Colorado River, which is only 100 meters wide. The Mississippi and Amazon Rivers are far bigger, but neither have made a giant canyon. So how did this one canyon get so grand? The Colorado River is unique in that is transports 500,000 tons of silt and sand every day. And for every mile the river travels, it drops 10 miles down. While this river took care of carving away a deep slit in the canyon, gravity and weather helped make the Grand Canyon wider and wider. But that's not the end of the story: The Grand Canyon is getting deeper and wider every day!!”

One Amazing Journey

As a single-again woman who has gone through the deepest and longest ordeal of your life, the Grand Canyon may not seem that amazing. (But we still suggest a trip there to see. It may help put everything into perspective). You are on an adventurous journey of your own and the sights are all new, to say the least. Scary maybe, but not impossible.

What you do and how you do it, will determine how wonderful and amazing your life really can be. The alternative, of course, is to sit and brood all day, every day and end up nowhere, sad and lonely. It’s definitely up to you because you are on your own now and no one can make decisions for you. No one is forcing you to move on. For those who wish to have a better life though, the options are endless. Ready to go? This is exciting!

You may be just starting--the first stage--or you may be in the middle or approaching the exact spot you are aiming for. It doesn’t matter how fast or how slow you wish to go. What does matter is that you never give up! You have dreams and ideas way in the back of your head that have been there for years. So, it’s time to get them out on the table like puzzle pieces and have some fun.

In fact, if you are a visual person and want to see this in a creative and concrete way, you could create a puzzle out of each piece of your dream. Choose Option 1 or 2 below whichever appeals to you.

OPTION 1: Puzzle

1. Grab some colored poster board or construction paper
2. Cut the whole piece into many different, odd, and crazy shapes
3. On the back side of each one, name one small thing you want to see happen (i.e., take a creative class at your community college; change the furniture around; buy new dishes at a local thrift store; change all bedding for new ones)
4. On the front, number each one so they fit together in order
5. On a separate piece of large poster board (different color), put your “puzzle” together, numbers facing up and secure with “movable” double sided tape

Done! It’s beautiful!

TO USE: Now each morning/week go to your puzzle and pick one number, check the back, and decide this is what you will do today. No guessing or getting stuck about what to do with your new life. This will point you in the right direction. Keep it up!

OPTION 2: Colored Image (something easier)

1. Purchase one of those numerous “adult coloring books”
2. Choose a page with separate elements, like flowers
3. Number and name each one with a “dream” item (see #3 above)
4. Let those items correspond with each day of the week/month

TO USE: each day color just one image you have named. When done, this is your guide for what to do that particular day. Easy, fun, and effective.

Beautiful Joy

Wide, Long, High and Deep

Your life can be as fun and interesting as you want. Whatever your passion, you can make it come true and create a beautiful life full of joy. As you go about each day, you will see just how very much God loves you and is willing to Guide you in all areas. Start each morning asking for His direction and thanking Him for all He provides.

Remember, His love for you is bigger than the Grand Canyon. Wow! In fact, HE IS THE ONLY ONE WHO MADE IT! Plan a trip to see His Amazing Grace!

"And may you have the power to understand, as all God's people should, how wide, how long, how high, and how deep his love is" (Ephesians 3:18-19 NLT).

How to Dig Yourself Out of the Jungle

Don't get lost in the jungle

There are a couple interesting shows on TV about how we all eventually reach a point in our homes when we cannot ignore the numerous piles of junk any longer. We even have the typical “junk drawer” where every bit and piece of our belongings end up in that one spot.

Stacks of magazines we keep for years thinking that after the first reading we will go back someday and re-read them. We justify that kind of hoarding as “reference material” and it makes us feel better than if we called it trash. Many of us gravitate to weekend garage sales (yep, I’m raising my hand too) and purchase another person’s junk they no longer want. Some of it is very useful but, occasionally we buy items just because they look like something we might be able to use. Then we throw them into a box in the garage, forget about them, and they end up in our own garage sale the following year. Oh, my!

The summer organization bug will soon arrive, and we start thinking of what we can do to clear out all the rubbish. If we never, ever discard anything--fearing we will need it someday--we could become a candidate for one of those hoarding shows. It’s like trying to dig our way out of a jungle that is about to devour us.

Stress-Free Answers

Those are all lifeless objects that we think we need, so we keep them. It appears our hoarding gives us a sense of security, which of course, is false. But the same thing goes on in our brains, emotions, and spirits. We get bogged down worrying about every little thing, most of which we can do nothing about.

Money, or the lack of it causes us much stress as most of us know. Don’t get caught believing money provides happiness. It does not! How many famously rich millionaires do we know that are truly happy? It might appear that way at first, but an excess of money generally brings an excess of responsibility, which equals excess stress. Think of all those lottery stories of winners one year after their big win. Many of them are worse off than if they had never gambled because they cannot keep up with all their new possessions. Believe it or not, many people fall into bankruptcy when the money is all gone!

Of course, money is not the only worry in life. We can get overwhelmed by relationships that have gone wrong, working in a job we hate, trying to survive after divorce, dealing with child custody, health issues, finding supportive friends, car repairs, anxiety, dieting, disappointment, and doubt. And on, and on, and on.

This is exactly why God commands us [Matthew 6:25-28] not to worry! Notice, it’s not a suggestion. He is serious about this subject. Why? Because worries are endless; they consume us. Only God knows our anguish when worry devours us. He never wants us in that state of unhappiness and mental chaos. And better yet, He has the answers to our dilemmas. He is just waiting for us to come to Him with our concerns.

Joy Personified

If we find ourselves completely worry-free (really?), the opposite problem may be our enemy. Pleasure. Too much of the wrong thing can steer us into a state of denial. We find ourselves hanging with an unsuitable crowd. Doing what we never thought we would. Ignoring our standards and principles. Filling every minute of the day and night pursuing bodily enjoyment, earthly treasures, and worshiping ourselves.

Please don’t get the incorrect idea here. God wants us to be happy and content. He is all about us finding our joy. Joy and love in friendships and close relationships. Discovering His plan and purpose for our lives can be the very best kind of pleasure; a fulfillment of everything we hope for. Living in God’s world, where He is ready and able to handle our worries and concerns, will provide us a way to grow stronger and stronger every day. Now, that’s a thing of beauty!

“This is what the story means: The seed is God’s message. The seed that fell among the thorny weeds is like those who hear God’s teaching, but they let the worries, riches, and pleasures of this life keep them from growing and producing good fruit” (Luke 8:11, 14 NCV).

How Can You Take Care of Your Soul?

Pink Baby Booties

What is more precious than a new baby? The answer is six babies at one time--a complete miracle! Two weeks ago, today, a woman gave birth to Poland's first set of sextuplets. Each beautiful little one weighed approximately 2.2 pounds. 

Here in the U.S., a Houston, Texas woman gave birth to six darlings within nine minutes in March of this year! All six were sets of twins--two male pairs and one female pair. The largest baby tipped the scale at 2 pounds, 14 ounces, and the smallest 1 pound, 12 ounces. Experts say the odds of birthing sextuplets are about one in 4.7 billion. Who else but God could create such miracles? 

Center of Everything

The birth of every single baby is a miracle because not only does each person born on this earth have numerous and intricate body parts, but every single person has a soul too. Unfortunately, many people never even give a thought to the fact they not only have a body to care for while on this earth but also a soul. It comprises our "total being" from the time we are born. "Each unique human soul begins at conception." Click here if you are curious: Questions Anyone?      

So why is it so important that the human body should even have a soul? First, in Hebrew where the word soul comes from, it means "life, self, breath"--a necessary component the same as a heart. And in the Bible, Jesus says, "Don't be afraid of those who want to kill your body; they cannot touch your soul. . ." (Matthew 10:28 NLT). In other words, our souls cannot be destroyed. They are that important!   

My Soul Sings with Joy

Second, your soul is the center of everything--all your good and not so good decisions. Truly, it's the "integrity" center of your being and it plays a part in helping you understand truthfulness, faithfulness, goodness, and morality to name but a few. This probably sounds familiar because as a single-again woman you have dealt with many of these human characteristics over and over.  

Your unique soul helps you face not only the major life-sustaining determinations that can change the direction of your life, but also warns you about every silly choice, indulgence, and worthless gain before you make it. 

Sometimes (like all humans) you may ignore your internal warnings and go ahead anyway with a poor choice. This is when it's important to stop and realize how you may or may not be taking care of your soul. It's like perhaps "bruising" the soul on purpose. The soul, therefore, is affected by every choice, good or not so good. 

The Joy Factor

Now let's switch gears for a moment. Which would you choose now that you are a single-again woman: joy or misery? No doubt you would choose joy but, hundreds of people willingly give up what would make their lives the very best they could be and unwillingly choose the worst possible option.        

For so many years as a married woman, you may have felt like there was no choice available for you. And this is totally understandable. Sometimes with a serious and worse yet, a dangerous situation in addition to no support from others, decisions seem impossible. 

Now you can understand by the discussion in today's blog that no matter what happened and when your soul is still intact! It belongs to only you and God. You made reasonable decisions to get to where you are right now and nothing will separate you from God's love--ever! 

He holds your soul in His hand and now you can make it on your own with His blessings of love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control (Galatians 5:22-23 NLT). It's the JOY FACTOR! Hallelujah! Amen.  

     

"And what do you benefit if you gain the whole world but lose your own soul?" (Matthew 16:26 NLT).

How Do You Express Thankfulness This Season?

The start of summer unofficially began this Memorial Day weekend (even though the calendar shows June 21^st as the day). Time for BBQs and eating all that mouth-watering food, beach and camping vacations, and, of course, a day off work. A definite fun season!

Hopefully, we are also not forgetting that today is a time to remember those who sacrificed for our very freedom to have vacations! We owe our sincere Thank You to all the men and women of every single war who fought and sacrificed their lives in one way or another. Some of us remember firsthand the stories that have been told because we personally know friends and family members who have our deepest gratitude.

Who Is Counting?

"There are approximately only 496,777 American veterans remaining of the 16 million who served our nation in World War II and the oldest of these living today is 112 years old and he smokes 12 cigars per day!" [Dept of Veteran's Affairs].

"9,087,000 military personnel served on active duty during the Vietnam Era (Aug. 5, 1964 - May 7, 1975)." [Veterans Affairs]

"2.7 million service members have been to the war zones of Iraq and Afghanistan since 2001 and over half of them have deployed more than once. Many times, that number of Americans have borne the costs of war as spouses, parents, children, and friends cope with their loved ones’ absence, mourn their deaths, or greet the changed person who often returns." [Watson-Brown University]

These are only three of the most recent in our memories. In 243 years on our own U.S. soil, veterans have fought over 25 wars for our freedom [Our Country published by Silver Burdett Ginn, Inc.; and Wikipedia].

The Daily Unknown

Please understand, no one likes war. No one. Obviously, we wouldn't be enjoying American freedom if it were not for our military. And military spouses and children should not be forgotten either. It takes great courage to "hang in" when the unknown must be faced every single day. Never knowing where or when they will need to pack up and go live somewhere else. Spending years waiting while their spouse is overseas. Children who never learn to make permanent friends because it takes time and time is elusive in the military. Today, stop and thank a military family you know or see. Just do it. They deserve respect and honor!

Living in the military sometimes takes its toll on women with devastating results. "Military workers of all ranks were most likely to be divorced by age 30, at a rate of 15%.” [Marketwatch.com]

Where is the Good News?

In a world filled with evil people, sometimes war is necessary to prevent an even greater evil. If Hitler had not been defeated by World War II, how many more millions would have been killed? If the American Civil War [1861-1865] had not been fought, how much longer would African Americans have had to suffer as slaves? (Before the Civil War even ended, President Lincoln, on January 1, 1863, formally issued the Emancipation Proclamation to liberate all slaves.)

"It is an error to say that God never supports a war. Jesus is not a pacifist. The most important thing we can be doing in a time of war is to be praying for Godly wisdom for our leaders, praying for the safety of our military, praying for a quick resolution to conflicts, and praying for a minimum of casualties among civilians on both sides." [gotquestions.org]

For a further study, click on this Link from GotQs.com:

WHY WAR?

“For everything there is a season. . . A time to love and a time to hate. A time for war and a time for peace” (Ecclesiastes 3:1, 8 NLT).

What Can You Do About Feeling Grumpy?

Another Grumpy Cat 

Today is a sad day for any feline lovers as the famous cat known as “Grumpy Cat” has passed away. She was only seven years old--considered young for a cat—but died of a urinary tract infection according to her owners.

   

“The blue-eyed cat with the withering stare and permafrown that suggested perpetual irritation . . .was not always Grumpy Cat. When she was a kitten, she was named Tardar Sauce. But before she was even a year old, a photo of her concave, grouchy look — the result of an underbite — made her famous, and her new name took hold.” (www.npr.org)

Some of you may be animal lovers and some not, but everyone probably has heard about that famous Grumpy stare! It’s a condition that can affect any human too, especially when faced with a life-changing situation such as a divorce or even a death in the family. Just ask, how often have I felt grumpy lately?

Turning Grumpy into Cheerful

It happens. Yes, it does. In fact, it is almost expected in the first days, weeks, and months after what you have gone through, so don’t beat yourself up over it; it’s a normal feeling. Of course, it is not a feeling that is enjoyable, entertaining, or exhilarating over an extended period. All that anxiety, worry, and distress can ruin your health.  

Hopefully, that uncomfortable state has passed for now. But in case it is still hanging around like a bad household odor, what might you do to reach a better frame of mind? Some of the following ideas have helped many women to find their “happy” place. Start by remembering this famous quip:

“If you always do what you’ve always done, you’ll always get what you’ve always gotten.” [Jessie Potter, educator, and counselor at the Woman to Woman Conference, 1981]

[Please note this quote was made popular much later by motivational speaker Tony Robbins].

Finding Your Happy Place

·         Read – go to the local library and find dozens of books on attitudes, gratitude, and making progress as a single-again woman. (Of course, Kindle works too). Start here because you don’t know what you don’t know!

Wanna Talk? 

·         Connect – Sitting home alone isn’t going to work. Open your Contacts on your smartphone or computer and count how many friends (especially single ones) you’ve been missing and call them today!

·         Talk - There is no shame or harm in speaking with a professional counselor or pastor about how to move past your past which is like an anchor holding you down.

·         Record – if you aren’t already journaling, please start. Instead of feeling angry, grumpy, and down, take your thoughts to the pages of your notebook (no one else will see it). Try to make this a daily habit and see what fabulous results you get. It doesn’t need to be lengthy. Nine minutes while drinking your coffee or tea is great. Now, you can begin your day refreshed!

·         Celebrate – one of the worse things you can do is decline invitations to have fun with people. It gets easier every time you say “Yes.” Just this one thing can cause a positive reaction in your mind and suddenly grumpiness is a thing of the past.

There are millions of things you can do to become the person you’ve always wanted to be. Do you have to change? Sure. Life is stale without change. But you can be in the driver’s seat this time around and create yourself a brand-new world just the way you dream of!

Who Is Going to Help You?

One of the best things about reaching a point in your life you can be proud of is being able to share it with others. Wanting to help other women who are still struggling with bitterness, negative thoughts, and uncomfortable feelings is truly a gift. You’ve been there—you’re an expert. You know how it goes and there are lots of options others need to hear about.

Speaking of “help,” none of these suggestions and tips will work without first asking the Lord God to direct your steps. He’s way ahead of you and is just waiting for you to talk to Him about your life and where it is going. He’s got ideas! So, perfect as He is, upon accepting Him as Lord of your life, He will give you his Helper called the Holy Spirit. His Spirit who is perfect in providing guidance, wisdom, and discernment. And how can you go any further without those?

“He comforts us in all our troubles so that we can comfort others. When others are troubled, we will be able to give them the same comfort God has given us” (2 Corinthians 1:4 NLT).

How is Your Adventurous Spirit?

Golden Gate Bridge

The Golden Gate Bridge spans the one-mile-wide strait connecting San Francisco Bay and The Pacific Ocean. If you have never been there, it's an amazing trip and a beautiful site across the 1.7 miles including an average height of 220 feet above the water! For anyone afraid of heights it can be scary looking down. Yet, it is not the longest bridge. In Louisiana, you would travel 23.83 miles across the Lake Pontchartrain Causeway and feel a bit dizzy! It must seem like a never-ending trip. 

Just like crossing on one of these bridges, your new journey as a single-again woman may seem endless and a bit scary to say the least. Every new experience--moving to a different house or city, learning how to use a monthly budget to pay the bills when in the past he did all that, preparing a resume maybe for the first time, and sleeping alone in the middle of the bed--is intimidating and daunting. 

Experience Adventure 

All these frightening experiences may appear to be a test of your will and determination; your adventurous spirit. You don't have any, you say? Probably not true since you have already gone through knee-deep "mud" in your life to get to this point right here. That stands for "Congratulations!" 

Doing things alone for the first time has certainly been a struggle no doubt about it. The fact is, it hasn't been easy and most likely will continue to try your patience. But listen with each new successful step you take, your determination will automatically kick-in. Nothing can keep you down now! 

Starting Point     

You know now that you can make it if you want. Of course, no one can force you if you choose not to try. But then, where do you go from there? So, assuming you believe in yourself, your question now may be, How? 

It might help to have a few real and concrete examples of women who took a chance, used their determination, and jumped into a new life even though everything tried to push them down. 

[The first two are from www.mydomaine.com]: 

Viola Davis - "Davis’s childhood explains a lot about her work ethic today. Growing up in poverty, she often faced hunger—even resorting to digging through dumpsters to find food. But she didn’t let this crush her. In fact, it fueled her and pushed her to do better for herself. “I tell my daughter every morning, ‘Now, what are the two most important parts of you?’ and she says, ‘My head and my heart.’ Because that’s what I’ve learned in the foxhole. What gets you through life is strength of character and strength of spirit and love.” 

Connie Britton - "Before she was cast as Tami Taylor on Friday Night Lights at age 39, Britton experienced her fair share of “heartbreak” from roles that got away—including missing out on the female lead in Jerry Maguire to Renée Zellweger. She never let that stop her though. With a positive “everything happens for a reason” attitude, Britton accepted the role as the football coach’s wife on the hit network series." [Note: she also starred later in the series, Nashville].

[And three from Good Housekeeping]: 

Mia Hamm, Soccer Champion - "She has scored more international goals than any other soccer player, and led a generation of adolescent girls to become passionate about sports."

Wendy Kopp, Founder, Teach for America - "It was her senior thesis at Princeton — a plan to create a corps of desperately needed teachers for schools in low-income neighborhoods. Twenty years later, Teach for America has trained more than 24,000 teachers and reached three million students." 

Sally Ride, Astronaut, and Astrophysicist - "The first American woman — finally — in space, 1983. Overall, Ride was the third woman in space after USSR. At the age of 32, she remains the youngest American astronaut to have traveled to space."

The Point

Yes, they are all famous. No, none of them started out that way. They had to fight for everything they received and came from backgrounds just like many of you. Think about it. Click on the links provided and read their whole stories. Then start believing in yourself. What are you dreaming of doing with your life? 

The Main Author and Defender

You are precious in the eyes of your Creator, as we all are. He waits for you to come and talk to Him about all the garbage in your life. God has solutions that you need. He is the Author of your story and the best Defender you will ever need or want. He truly cares about you and your life; always has, always will. Therefore, He gave you a Spirit that craves adventure. Are you ready to begin?

"The Lord himself will fight for you. Just stay calm" (Exodus 14:14 NLT).