Are You a “Possible” Woman?

Each month of the year has its own birthstone with its own unique meaning and historical significance. Emerald—a breathtaking clear, deep green--for instance, is the birthstone for May and symbolizes patience, unity, compassion, and unconditional love. In June, the pearl exhibits balance, calm, purity, integrity, and loyalty. In ancient times, color was the most important feature of a gemstone, so there was little difference then between a ruby and a garnet which are very similar to the naked eye. Today, we like to celebrate by wearing our own particular “birthstone.”

Mining for these beautiful gems seems almost impossible. Without having ever been to a mining camp, we can still imagine how difficult it probably is to dig out huge boulders, rocks, stones, and pebbles and then inspect them for their potentially beautiful “insides.” An all-consuming project for sure! However, at a gem fair, we might be able to more easily see a rock that looks rough, dull and nothing special on the outside, but when cut open, is absolutely the most beautiful thing we could see!

Impossible Odds

Some of us may even feel the same way at times. Surely, we’ve had our share of days when we feel “rough and unattractive” on the outside. Not a single piece of clothing looks good on us, our hair and make-up suddenly look strange in the mirror, and our feet are so swollen (from too much salt?) we can’t get them into our best shoes.

But we know how this goes. Our hormones have a habit of attacking us at the worse times. We are convinced we will never look or feel good again. We scream our lives are “just an impossibility.” Or so we think. But that is far from the truth. Each one of us was individually created with a unique personality and, for that matter, with a unique set of genes and hormones. Our “insides” are truly beautiful just like our birthstone gem!

I’M Possible Days

Did you notice that "impossible" begins with I-M? Yes, you are Possible! It's quite possible you are stronger than you think. Quite possible you are the best mom for your children. Possible you are creative, smart, and tenacious. Sometimes all we need is a special “moment” by ourselves or a few hours to take a breather. How might this look if we gave it a try?

·        Calling a best friend is a great way to get some perspective on our day.  

·        Distracting ourselves from what is bothering us can work wonders.

·        Turning off all electronics and having a quiet time brings peace.

·        Reading or having fun with a hobby is rejuvenating.

·        Even housecleaning can be therapeutic for some of us.

·        Try walking into a florist just to smell the flowers--it will bring a smile to your face.

·        Help someone else who is having a bad day—your impossibilities will disappear fast.

We Get the Best

Have you ever heard “God loves you!” Truly, He does love every single one of us, every single day. Even on the not-so-good days when our hormones play tricks on us!

He is the God of possibilities: Our Heavenly Father. Unlike any father on earth, He is always and forever good, kind, and loving. He’s in the business of making sure every one of His children knows how pleased He is with us when we seek Him for answers. God smiles when we each find our true purpose and gifts as women and use them to honor Him. We can count on Him.

“He replied, ‘What is impossible for people is possible with God'” Luke 18:27 NLT.

Freedom is Not Free!

Today we pause for a special message for all who sacrificed for us.  

We owe our sincere Thank You to all the men and women of every single war who fought and sacrificed their lives in one way or another for our freedom! Some of us remember firsthand the stories that have been told because we personally know friends and family members who have our deepest gratitude.

"There are approximately only 558,000 veterans remaining of the 16 million who served our nation in World War II. [Veteran's Administration]. The oldest living WWII veteran today is 112 years old!"

"9,087,000 military personnel served on active duty during the Vietnam Era (Aug. 5, 1964-May 7, 1975)." [Veterans Administration]

"2.7 million service members have been to the war zones of Iraq and Afghanistan since 2001, and over half of them have deployed more than once. Many times that number of Americans have borne the costs of war as spouses, parents, children, and friends cope with their loved ones’ absence, mourn their deaths, or greet the changed person who often returns." [Watson-Brown University]

These are only three of the most recent in our memories. In 242 years on our own U.S. soil, veterans have fought over 25 wars for our freedom [Our Country published by Silver Burdett Ginn, Inc.; and Wikipedia].

Taking Our Heads Out of the Sand

Please understand, no one likes war. No one. Obviously, we wouldn't be enjoying American freedom if it were not for our military. And military spouses and children should not be forgotten either. It takes great courage to "hang in" when the unknown must be faced every single day. Never knowing where or when they will need to pack up and go live somewhere else. Spending years waiting while their spouse is overseas. Children who never learn to make permanent friends because it takes time and time is elusive in the military. Today, stop and thank a military family you know or see. Just do it. They deserve the respect and honor!

Living in the military sometimes takes its toll on women with devastating results. "The divorce rate among both officer and enlisted men and women over 2014 was 3.1 percent, only slightly higher than the 2005 rate of 3 percent. The newly released statistics show that the rate has steadily declined since 2011 when it reached a high water mark of 3.7 percent." [The Pentagon, U.S. Dept of Defense]

Where is the Good News?

A Time for Peace

"In a world filled with evil people, sometimes war is necessary to prevent even greater evil. If Hitler had not been defeated by World War II, how many more millions would have been killed? If the American Civil War had not been fought, how much longer would African-Americans have had to suffer as slaves?

"It is an error to say that God never supports a war. Jesus is not a pacifist. The most important thing we can be doing in a time of war is to be praying for Godly wisdom for our leaders, praying for the safety of our military, praying for a quick resolution to conflicts, and praying for a minimum of casualties among civilians on both sides."

For a further study, click on this Link from GotQs.com:

WHY WAR?

“For everything there is a season. . . A time to love and a time to hate. A time for war and a time for peace” (Ecclesiastes 3:1, 8 NLT).

Building Your Legacy

We are off and running into another summer! It's obvious time does not stay still! However, last summer, London made an announcement that Big Ben would be placed on a "pause" for the first time in 157 years! Renovations will take until 2021. That's a lot of work! The hands of time in this instance will be silenced. So if you are traveling to London, be prepared (insert smile here!). Most people will miss the "gong," but probably there will be some people who will enjoy the peace and quiet.

While preparing this blog each week, peace and quiet is the most valuable commodity in bringing you a message made just for you. Using instrumental classical music (no interruption of voices) playing in the background is the key for this blogger. Why? Because we strive to encourage and help those of us who are moving in the same direction on this journey. And you deserve our complete attention.

Starting Off On the Right Foot
It's a great time to start off on the "right foot" to create something new and fresh. If you've never used a journal to express your thoughts, there is no better time than today. Yes, we all have busy lives and can't even think of doing one more thing. But, can you find just seven minutes in the morning by yourself? Maybe after the kids (if you still have any at home) run off to play with friends. Even five and a half minutes would work. Try sitting down with a cup of coffee or tea and see where this could take you. You will be surprised how fun and rewarding this activity really is and it's a way to build a new legacy.

Why make time for a journal in the first place?

There are many beneficial reasons to establish this new habit. Think about these seven and add others to it as you go along:

• Removes all the negative thoughts clogging our heads.
• Makes room for recording positive experiences. 
• Keeps a running log of our successes on the job/college/life.
• Great way to learn from our mistakes without beating ourselves up.
• Records ideas and reflections before they leave our minds.
• Good way to start making dreams come true.
• Can be used for future projects like memoirs, legacies, and autobiographies.

Journals can clear our minds so we can move forward in an organized way. And eventually, we can savor the fun of it all. Re-reading our own stories. Finding beautiful journals to write in. Discovering things about ourselves we never knew were hidden in our minds.

Writing in a journal is a worthwhile activity used by many people, including famous men and women such as writer Virginia Woolf, Ernest Hemingway, Anne Frank, Mark Twain, poet Sylvia Plath, and even composer Ludwig van Beethoven. We would have little history on these people if not for their journals and diaries. We may not wish to be famous, but our thoughts, experiences, and stories may be of interest one day to our families. They might even read about themselves!

An Ancient Plan
Paper and books, of course, are ancient inventions. So "journaling" has been around for centuries. The Egyptians discovered papyrus ("paper"). Books in the ancient world were written on white-washed boards, fabric, animal skins, and clay. People have always loved to write down their thoughts!

But the very first original "Writer" was God himself who inspired over 40 men to write 66 different books called the Bible. It was written over a period of 1,600 years originally in Hebrew, Aramaic, and Greek. Eventually, by 1980, the Bible has been translated into 1,100 languages. A great "Journal" to read!

"Every part of Scripture is God-breathed and useful one way or another--showing us truth, exposing our rebellion, correcting our mistakes, training us to live God's way" 2 Timothy 3:16 The Message.

"Put God in charge of your work, then what you've planned will take place" Proverbs 16:3 The Message.

Are You Trapped?

Feeling Trapped?

We love it and we hate it. Money, that is. Has there ever been a “trap” in our lives that is more controlling than this paradox? We can’t live without it if we want food and shelter, yet when we have enough, we strive to get even more and more and never reach personal satisfaction. It is, perhaps, the biggest concern of ours right now given we have just begun a new life.  

“After cashing a check at the bank, the woman in front of me stood staring at her money. "Did I give you enough back?" asked the teller. "Yes," she said. "But barely." (Reader’s Digest: Money Jokes). It’s truly amazing how fast money goes right out of our pocket! When we finally get our paycheck, there is a very long list of where and how we spend our money. It can go in hundreds of directions. And the money runs out before we even get to the bottom of the list.

The Hole Keeps Getting Deeper

Unfortunately, many people depend on credit to get them there. Excess credit cards with balances that are “maxed” out, extremely large loans including home loans, and even borrowing from friends and family. At some point in our lives, we have all done it. This is enticingly a debt trap that is extremely difficult to get out of. A vicious circle. A catch-22.

There is a true story of a woman [name here is unnecessary] who was whirling from this exact scenario. When she got a divorce (the money problem was only one of many issues at this point), there were eleven credit cards, all “maxed” out and a house neither she nor her soon-to-be ex-husband could afford. The house went up for sale and the credit cards were divided up to be paid off. Not a good start to a brand new life!

Sometimes, it can take years to get out of debt. It’s painful. Humiliating. Embarrassing. But possible. Very possible, if we are determined to make it work. And work is exactly what it takes. The outcome may be slow as we go inch by inch to create a much better life. But watching it happen is truly satisfying to say the least. Anyone can do it.

Re-build Your Life

So, how can we reach this point of being debt free? It seems there are as many books on the subject as there is money in the bank! So be careful who you listen to and what you read to be true. There are, however, reliable and credible experts in the money management field who can help get us there (see a couple links below).   

Some of the following examples, suggestions, and encouragement, might help to get started with this important life-building plan. This will move your plan ahead of the game when you decide to take a class, meet with a money counselor, or take an online course.

• Grab a notebook. On the first page, draw a line down the middle creating two columns.
• First Column: “Liabilities.” List every single thing that is owed including very small to very large items. Not just the monthly mortgage/rent and other bills, but also people borrowed from, collection items, and that “bounced” check at the bank. Everything.
• Second Column: “Assets.” List every bit of income of any kind that comes in during the month on a regular basis. This could include a paycheck, crafty side business, home computer services, babysitting, disability check, etc etc. Also list the value of every asset owned, like the house, car, boat, and larger furniture.
• Breathe. This exercise may take awhile and it might be difficult at first if it’s never been done before. But the purpose is to know exactly what is available in our pocket and what is not. There is no solving a problem without knowing what is going on. This can be eye-opening but will provide valuable information to get started. Experts, agencies, or counselors will ask for this kind of list.
• Budget. Yes, it’s a “horrible” thought. Teeth-clenching. But without it, the lists above will be useless. The nice thing is, once created and used, this monthly habit will feel “weird” if skipped.  

It’s too big of a subject to cover thoroughly here, and there are many individual and unique methods that are useful, so if unsure how to create a workable budget, get some help! But don’t just not do it because it is THE key to finding peace about the money situation.

The following links will definitely be concrete ways to help solve any debt problem and start a much better life. DON’T give up--it’s worth it!

Money Management

Dave Ramsey

Where Does It Come From and How Do We Get It?

We may never have thought about it much, but ALL of our money and whatever possessions we may have were generously given and will continue to be provided by only one Source, the Lord God Almighty. He hates to see us struggle. That is why He has a plan for us. God wants us to use our money wisely. When we do, He provides even more. When we give back to him on a regular basis, He gives us even more! It’s true, He says to test Him on this.

“. . .Bring all the tithes into the storehouse so there will be enough food in my Temple. If you do,” says the Lord of Heaven’s Armies, “I will open the windows of heaven for you. I will pour out a blessing so great you won’t have enough room to take it in! Try it! Put me to the test!” Malachi 3:10 NLT.

Are Your Windows Open?

Believe it or not, some amazing solar inventions began production as far back as 1839 by a French physicist. And Albert Einstein in 1922, and Bell Labs in 1954 continued more modern uses for solar lamps/lights/lanterns. They are not a 21st Century invention by any means as some may think! Today, however, LED lamps, solar panels, and batteries compose the lighting systems we are now familiar with seeing in our streets, homes, and gardens.

Sunlight actually changes the negative into positive energy. The electrons then transfer electricity through wires in the cells to a battery for storage. Photoreceptors detect darkness and turn on the light throughout the night! Wow! Solar lamps can be very useful in many situations, including even charging our cell phones that we can't seem to do without. Crazy to understand and imagine all this amazing activity, especially if we are not scientifically inclined!

Opening the Windows

The point here is that, of course, modern humans cannot survive very well without electric light, except perhaps in daylight hours. What we would do without light for long in this day and age could be quite frustrating. We are thinking now of the unfortunate pattern of annual hurricanes in the Gulf Coast and the Caribbean leaving some residents without power for months!

Without basic daily necessities, especially during natural disasters, emotional destruction, and personal devastation, we must depend on our neighbors and those organizations/non-profits prepared to help. This is how they are using their “light” to dispel our “darkness” that swallows up hope. After going through what we as single-again women have experienced, it is easy to just crawl into a corner and ignore how to make our lives better than they have ever been.

Once we are healthier and on our way to figuring things out, we can readily see how we can use our own “light” to help others. We recognize the problem when we see other women going through what we did. We know that living in secluded “darkness” is not even an option, but instead is a sickness that spreads to every part of our body.

We can explore how to open our eyes and further grow into the strong women we are deep down inside. How can we positively use our “light” and create joy?

• Reach out to other single women. Invite them for coffee or a lunch date. Don't forget the hug!
• Practice simply listening to her story.
• Seek common interests and share fun things: movies, hobbies, cooking, antiquing, etc
• Volunteer together at a women’s shelter.
• Teach her a skill she wants to learn and vice versa.

These are just suggestions to get started. Be sure to keep adding to the list; try to break the Guinness Book of World Records for Kindness. Go for it!

Better Than Einstein

The Creator of all Light knew we wouldn’t make it in the dark for long. On the very first day, God said, “Let there be light” and there was light. . .And there was evening and there was morning. . .

Because God is all-knowing, He also knew we needed the evening to rest. But not for too long. He gave us gifts and talents to use to help each other and we can’t do that if we spend all our hours in the “dark.”

“Your eye is like a lamp that provides light for your body. When your eye is healthy, your whole body is filled with light” Matthew 6:22 NLT.

“Your eyes are windows into your body. If you open your eyes wide in wonder and belief, your body fills up with light. If you live squinty-eyed in greed and distrust, your body is a dank cellar. If you pull the blinds on your windows, what a dark life you will have!” Matthew 6:22-23 MSG.

Moms Are the Best!

IN CELEBRATION OF MOTHER'S DAY 2018, 

PLEASE SEE OUR 
"SPECIAL EDITION" 
BLOG POST 

DATED SUNDAY, MAY 13TH.

Special Moms' Day Edition

Mothers around the world sing nursery rhymes and read childhood stories to their children over and over. It’s comforting not only to our child but to us moms when we see the sparkling eyes of our child gazing up as he/she listens attentively to Mom’s voice. Sometimes if we play-act the sounds, this alone will quiet a restless one. This nightly habit is the first lesson we can teach our child in establishing a “quiet” time that can be used for a lifetime.  

Of all the many children's books in print, The Little Golden Books can still be found in most homes and these stories are remembered well into adulthood. Who doesn’t still enjoy with fond memories The Poky Little Puppy series, The Fire Engine Book, The Hug Book, or Richard Scarry’s Colors? Seventy-six years ago when they first began publishing these books, they only cost 25 cents!

Likewise, there are Five Star selections for our babies, toddlers, and beyond such as God Bless You and Good Night, I Prayed For You, Baby’s First Bible Stories, and The Complete Illustrated Children’s Bible. All are excellent ways to bond with our children and grandchildren and are the most purchased books for kids. As God instructs parents, “Start children off on the way they should go, and even when they are old they will not turn from it.” (Proverbs 22:6 NIV)

Mothers Deserve a Break

It’s certainly not easy, especially for first-time moms, to know what to do to raise a child who values others and has confidence in their own gifts and abilities. We can only do our best with what we have. In celebrating Mother’s Day, we can relax in the fact that God has given us a special gift to hold in our arms forever.

We won’t always be able to protect our children and guard them as they get older. We can’t be with them twenty-four hours a day, so it’s okay to drop the “guilt trip.” They will most certainly grow and be off on their own one day. First during all the school years, and then into adulthood and their own family. We can only continue doing our best, listen to them, and support their ideas and ambitions.

What they learn as a young child, good or not-so-good, will affect their personality and become part of who they are forever. An excellent child development website called Facts for Life says,

“The first five years of a child's life are fundamentally important. They are the foundation that shapes children's future health, happiness, growth, development and learning achievement at school, in the family and community, and in life in general.”

For further information about this site CLICK HERE:

Teach Them Right

This site is just an example of the many that can give us numerous ways to be the best moms possible. We simply can’t know every single thing without educating ourselves. So, never give up! Our children are worth it. [Note: Fresh Start Momentum does not promote, endorse, or receive any compensation for suggesting a particular website].

One Last Thing

We can do every single thing we can think of to raise the most well-developed child and still, as an adult, they may go their own way and not pay attention to all that we taught them. We know ourselves that we didn’t necessarily take the wise advice of our own parents either, but instead did what we wanted. And that decision may have worked out for us and, then again, it may not have been our best choice.

The verse above from Proverbs 22:6 is not a mistake. It does say our child “will not turn from it” (our direction), but yet, some do. Just know, that at some time in the future--and it may be a very, very long time away--in the back of their minds, our grown child will come to recognize that the Lord, who is all-powerful, was, in fact, guiding our hand in raising them. They will then choose their own path in being the best parent they can be with the Lord’s help.

We will not keep them [stories] from our children; we will tell those who come later about the praises of the LORD. We will tell about his power and the miracles he has done. Psalm 78:4 (NCV)

Happy Mother's Day to each one of you!

What’s Your Next Queue?

While savoring our first or second cup of morning coffee or tea, maybe at our local coffee shop, we may be thinking of our long "To Do" list for the day after the kids are safely delivered to school. Funny how yesterday we thought that list was going to get shorter. But somehow, it’s right back again today with twenty different things to handle. Will it ever go away so we can have time for ourselves? Depends.

Grrr! It’s endless. So we may be asking ourselves how in the world other women get all the chores and errands done in a 24-hour day. Certainly, there are women out there that are experts at organizing and planning. In fact, many have made careers out of becoming professional organizers and it’s fascinating, especially if we are not gifted in that particular area.

Your Queue: First Things First

There are companies who pride themselves on teaching their employees how to organize themselves. In fact, one such company (which will go unnamed) bases the annual review of an employee on that exact subject. Years ago (most likely before all the personal tech items were available) this company held mandatory classes in maintaining a personal and work-related Day Planner and they were quite serious about it. The employee was required to bring the Planner with them to the review. Their annual salary was based on that Day Planner! That’s how important the whole organizing and planning aspect was to them.

Having personal skills to stay organized is a valuable life lesson for sure. This is why there are so many tech tools, programs, apps, classes, etc to help us all out of our daily chaos. It’s a big business. And getting organized can help us to get those errands and projects in our lives done. If “tech” isn’t your thing, go the “old school” way and figure out first things first--your queue--on paper.  

Priorities are what it is all about. A great way to do this is list everything that needs to be done in the next 24 hours as you think of them, including big and little things. Don’t forget to include doctor appointments, network meetings, dog grooming, and your child's science project! Next, assign a letter to each item, like A for All-important, B for Bite (as it will come back and bite you), and C for Cramp (too many things pushed until tomorrow will cramp your style). If you are more visual, color coding works too. It might look like this (don’t go crazy, they don’t have to be in order):

C - Clean out the pantry.

A - Annual Doctor visit today.

B - Get tires rotated on the car.

A - Pick up daughter after dance lesson.

B - Drop off library books.

A - Type up a draft for the meeting.

C - Plant fall flowers in the garden.

B - Get to the gym.

A - College accounting exam this evening.

O.k., you’ve got this. Now tackle all the urgent “A” items first, then “B” if you possibly can, and finally “C,” or they can be pushed to tomorrow if needed. Whether it’s a printed Day Planner or a digital device calendar, once you get the hang of this, your days will go much smoother from here on out.

Only One AA Item

There is only one category that is considered an AA item, and it’s not a battery. The rest of the A, B, C list will never work out as planned without first making Quiet Time with God each morning. This is your AA item. Don’t ignore it or push it to the C list because you’ll be left wondering how you went in circles and arrived right back at a state of chaos and confusion.

“Yes, I am the vine; you are the branches. Those who remain in me, and I in them, will produce much fruit. For apart from me you can do nothing” John 15:5 NLT.