How Do We Get What We Want Now?

“However, if I were to let my life be taken over by what is urgent, I might very well never get around to what is essential. It's so easy to spend your whole time being preoccupied with urgent matters and never starting to live, really live.” (Henri J.M. Nouwen, Dutch Catholic Priest, and Professor at University of Notre Dame, Yale and Harvard Divinity schools)  

In our ultra-busy, keyboard world, how do we find enough hours to get anything done? Do we make time for what is important? Seems our ringtones and touch sounds would successfully remind us what to do and when since they are so “smart.” 

That Was Then, This is Now 

Many of us grew up under a firm hand that required perfection. Things had to be done exactly right at the exact time. This taught us to expect the world, our world, to never fall under a human mistake of any kind. We may have even lived with a spouse that expected the same thing in his wife. It created a lot of guilt and turned us into stressed-out women. 

Our lives may still feel like a whirlwind, but feelings cannot really be trusted. They change from moment to moment. What is true is that we are smart women and that does not change! We have been through enough to know what we want now. We may not know quite how to get it just yet, but we have ideas running around in our heads.

First, let us sit down and start a notebook. We can get those what-do-I-do-now thoughts out of our heads and onto paper. They will become real goals and the strain and pressure will stop giving us headaches. Get some colorful dividers for different categories important to us. Suggestions: Dreams, Designs, and Drawings. Plans, Patterns, and Projects. Keep going. Have fun with it! 

If we are naturally visual people, why not cut out photos from magazines that represent our goals and paste them into our notebooks? On the other hand, if we are more comfortable with being a tactile person, try painting and create mixed-media pages. By the way, if there are still children at home, show them they can start their own Dream Notebook. This will help them get excited about life too and they will be way ahead of the game of life!    

Meet the Creator of Dreams

God did not mean for us to be so weary and worried all the time. He has plans for us and a lot to say about our needs (hint: being discontent with life is not one of them). 

Making ourselves frantic if the pillowcases never got white enough in the laundry will rob us of our joy. This is why it is so important to get in touch with God daily. First thing in the morning while the coffee, tea, or hot chocolate is brewing is the perfect time to ask what plans He has for each of us today. He has a perfect answer and is delighted with the kind of women we are! 

“But those who trust in the Lord will find new strength. They will soar high on wings like eagles. They will run and not grow weary. They will walk and not faint” (Isaiah 40:31 NLT).

 

What Was Your Best Day?

Today, Fresh Start Momentum begins a SUMMER SISTER SERIES highlighting the lives of some famous and amazing women who might just encourage us in our struggles. True stories that can give us insights for our lives in the 21st Century and how all women--married or not--have always been important throughout history. Join us each Monday for the next five weeks as we showcase our "sisters."

Big Sisters Can Be a Blessing

Sometimes it takes a little faith and a head on our shoulders to get things done. In the process, we might even learn some hard lessons, as in the story about this amazing girl:

Miriam was no exception. Her brother was as famous as one could get. His name was Moses and Miriam saved his life right after he was born. At a young age of 12, she watched her mother devise a plan to place Moses into a waterproof basket and send it down the Nile River to safety. They did this to save him from being slaughtered along with all little Jewish boys as ordered by the king of Egypt.

Miriam carefully watched the basket and then witnessed Pharaoh’s daughter remove the baby, even though she knew he was a Hebrew baby doomed for death. Miriam was quick-thinking and told Pharaoh’s daughter she would help to get a Hebrew woman to nurse the baby. The woman was actually Moses’ mother! Miriam was not only good under pressure but later became a leader during the Exodus, a prophetess, and a songwriter. Very ambitious, indeed!

Miriam, however, became jealous of Moses as he grew up and criticized his leadership. She also didn't care for his choice of a certain woman to become his wife. Sound familiar? To make things even worse, Miriam and another sibling expressed their resentment in public. And here was when Miriam had some hard lessons to learn about the motives behind destructive criticism of others.

Simple Answer, Difficult Problem

Many issues surely factor into why we find it so easy to criticize others. So many issues, in fact, it's best to speak to a doctor specializing in this area if we find criticism is a serious problem in our lives.   

True perfection found only in nature

In general, criticism can grow in us because we not only dislike what the other person is doing or how they are doing it. But because in some way or another, we believe it will negatively affect us or disturb our life. It's an ego problem in its simplest form. However, we can't possibly know what's in the other person's head. Only God can have that kind of insight.   

Most of the time, we allow our pride to convince us we are right and they are not. Then we go about trying to tell them how to live and placing blame. The result is mass destruction of the ugliest kind.

Five Constructive Measures We Can Use

1. Look at the motives behind our criticism.

2. Use praise first, then offer suggestions only.

3. Concentrate on the behavior, not the person.

4. Use examples from our own life.

5. Support the other person in finding ways to improve.

[Find Miriam’s story in the Holy Bible, Exodus 2 and 15; Numbers 12 and 20.]

For I brought you out of Egypt and redeemed you from slavery. I sent Moses, Aaron, and Miriam to help you. Micah 6:4