Where Can We Find Help?

Use caution!

No one in their right minds would ever want to come across or tempt an animal such as a wild tiger. Especially one that is not in a good mood! Of course, we can probably all remember the famous duo, Siegfried & Roy who made a career out of training and handling wild animals and they were very good at it for many years entertaining audiences in Las Vegas. (Roy had a stroke on stage and his white tiger bit him ending Roy’s career. He died recently on May 8, 2020, from Covid-19).

Many of us are animal lovers and some not. Animals can be demanding but they certainly warm our hearts and offer companionship. And they do such funny things! But we admit, there are animals who have a grumpy attitude about them causing us a not-so-happy encounter if we have ever had the unfortunate occasion of being bitten.

Amazingly, grumpiness is a trait that can affect humans too, especially when faced with a life-changing situation such as a divorce or even a death in the family. Just ask, how often have I felt grumpy lately?

Turning Grumpy into Cheerful

It happens. Yes, it does. In fact, it is almost expected in the first days, weeks, and months following a divorce or death in the family. So, let’s not beat ourselves up over it; it’s a normal feeling. Of course, over an extended period, it is not so enjoyable, entertaining, or exhilarating. All that anxiety, worry, and distress can ruin our health.  

Hopefully, that uncomfortable state has passed for now. But in case it is still hanging around like a bad household odor, what might we do to reach a better frame of mind? Some of the following ideas have helped many women to find their “happy” place. Start by remembering this famous quip:

“If you always do what you’ve always done, you’ll always get what you’ve always gotten.” [Jessie Potter, educator, and counselor at the Woman to Woman Conference, 1981]

[Please note this quote was made popular much later by motivational speaker Tony Robbins].

Finding Our Happy Place

Get out and be happy!

• Read – go to the local library and find dozens of books on attitudes, gratitude, and making progress as a single-again woman. (Of course, Kindle works too). A good starting place because we don’t know what we don’t know!
• Connect – sitting home alone isn’t going to work. Better to open the Contacts on our smartphones or computer and count how many friends (especially single ones) we’ve been missing and make a friendly call today!
•  Talk - there is no shame or harm in speaking with a professional counselor or pastor about how to move past our past which is like an anchor holding us down.
•  Record – start journaling. Really. Instead of feeling angry, grumpy, and down, we can take our thoughts to the pages of our notebook (no one else will see it). Try to make this a daily habit and see what fabulous results we get. It doesn’t need to be lengthy. Nine minutes while drinking our coffee or tea in the morning is great. Now, we can begin our day refreshed!
•  Celebrate – one of the worse things we can do is decline invitations to have fun with people. It gets easier every time we say “Yes.” Just this one thing can cause a positive reaction in your mind and suddenly grumpiness is a thing of the past.

There are millions of things we can do to become the person we’ve always wanted to be. Do we have to change? Sure. Life is stale without change. But we can be in the driver’s seat this time around and create for ourselves a brand-new world just the way we dream of!

Who Is Going to Help Us?

One of the best things about reaching a point in our life we can be proud of is being able to share it with others. Wanting to help other women who are still struggling with bitterness, negative thoughts, and uncomfortable feelings is truly a gift. We’ve been there—we’re experts. We know how it goes and there are lots of options others need to hear about.

Speaking of “help,” none of these suggestions and tips will work without first asking the Lord God to direct our steps. He’s way ahead of us and is just waiting for us to talk to him about our lives and where they are going. He’s got ideas! So, perfect as he is, upon accepting him as Lord of our life, he will gladly give us his Helper called the Holy Spirit. His Spirit will provide guidance, wisdom, and discernment. And how can we go any further without those?

“He comforts us in all our troubles so that we can comfort others. When others are troubled, we will be able to give them the same comfort God has given us” (2 Corinthians 1:4 NLT).