Hate is never the answer to hate. History has proven this truth over and over. Yet there are those who still allow extreme, out-of-control emotions to fill themselves with hostility leading to violent attacks and aggression toward others. And, yes, sadly, loss of someone's life is almost always a part of it.
“On a day like today, there are many directions we can go in our prayer...We can be in sorrow, in anger even...including anger at God for letting something like this happen." Instead, El Paso Rev Mike Lewis urged them [funeral attendees] to "have faith and to love one another, especially those who are hard to love.” (www.latimes.com)
Making Good Decisions Better
Let's
be clear, though, and not get the wrong idea. In no way does God ever cause
the hatred that can destroy others. Only pure evil lashing out with arms of
fire can cause such violence.
“Scripture shows that God did not create evil and does not promote it; rather, it describes God’s actions in combating it. God limits the impact of evil, warns us of the dangers of evil, acts to stop the spread of evil, gives us an escape from evil, and will eventually defeat evil forever." [gotquestions.org]
Something many people do not understand is the free will God willingly gives each one of us. He gave us that gift of free will because he loves us and wants us to make good decisions that will benefit our lives and those we love and that he cares about (which is everyone he has created). Never would God want us to use free will as part of a plan to kill others!
Choices,
Challenges, and Changes
How
about our own choices and decisions since we became single-again women? It's
understandable our own emotions were running high while dealing with all the
challenges required to get to a better place in our lives. The shift in
marital status alone may have caused a change of living arrangements, school
(for both us and/or our children), new friends or a new job, and certainly
finances. All stress-caused emotions. It certainly wasn’t easy looking in the
mirror each morning at someone we didn’t even recognize. We've all been there
in one way or another. We changed. We are still changing. Hopefully for the
better.
However, it’s possible we are still not in a good place. Our lives are crawling very slowly, and they are not quite where we want them to be. We haven’t moved out of the anxiety phase and may even be heading towards depression. How many times have we pulled the covers over our heads in the morning? Pretended to exist solely on potato chips, cookies, and ice cream just because we couldn’t find the energy to cook a decent meal? It happens and is quite common but tolerated only to a certain degree. Eventually either we move or some outside force will move us. What we don’t want is watching our lives get buried in the mundane.
Rather than ignoring all these unhealthy symptoms, it’s time to gain some momentum. We know we cannot change others around us (we’ve tried!), nor can they change us. We are the only ones who can do the changing and isn’t that a good thought? We finally get to create our lives exactly the way we want them. Something that may have held us back so far is thinking we need to re-create our old lives and we just don’t know where to begin. Frankly, that is the number one major stumbling block because our old life is gone. It's like trying to fix something without any workable parts. Our new life is here right now! And that is exciting because we are not going to re-create anything—we are going to start fresh.
Get ready to have some fun! Here are nine ideas or suggestions that will set our feet in motion. Try one or all of them:
Choices –
Adopt
that new pet we’ve always wanted
Join
a club (i.e., health, art, book) and make new friends
Pick
a non-profit organization and volunteer
Challenges –
Turn
a hobby into a new business
Take
a class in computer graphics, French, or cooking
Write
a book (memoir, children’s, etc)
Changes –
Move
to a new neighborhood or state
Get
a new hairdo, including color
Adopt
a new nutrition plan and get healthier
It’s Simple: Love God and Love Others
Are
we the one who can help lessen the impact of evil? Sounds difficult, but God
obviously gave us the freedom of choice and gifts/talents to use. If we can
find just one little way to show love to a neighbor or a stranger in need, it’s
a start. We can decide to do our part. Will we?
“God has provided the one and only means to make all wrongs right.” Part of that plan is to accept Him as Lord and Savior and then help another to do the same before it's too late. “One day, God’s plan to defeat and destroy evil [sin] will be fully complete.” [gotquestions.org]
"The world's sin is unbelief in me" (John 16:9 NLT).
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