How to Get Off the Merry-go-Round

As children, many of us thoroughly enjoyed going on the Merry-go-Round at any amusement park. The horses were not quite as difficult to stay on as real ones! These were colorfully painted with long flowing manes and they rose up and down with rhythm and precision from the fun music constantly playing. The white stallions were the most beautiful and favorites of so many little girls.

In our grown-up worlds, sometimes the Merry-go-Round just needs to stop! We face interruptions daily as we try to get things done. Some days, we get absolutely nothing done by the time the clock strikes 5:00 p.m. and it's time to get dinner on the table. It's maddening! We need peace and quiet to even think past all the demands and distractions bombarding us. 

This suggestion may be difficult and take much practice, but relaxation experts often recommend finding a quiet place and try just being still in order to calm the heart and soul. Quiet and still. It's been proven that three slow, deep breaths in the nose and out the mouth to a count of four will actually reduce blood pressure. It really does work. 

Better to have one handful with quietness than two handfuls with hard work and chasing the wind. Ecclesiastes 4:6

We are all human. Women of many different ages, temperaments, styles, and professions. But God still gave each one of us free will and choices and, because of those gifts, there are times when we make mistakes and bad choices along the way. This freedom causes our worlds to get out of control, like a Merry-go-Round gone into a spin. Eventually it can be stopped if we choose to give it effort and time. Nothing says we have to drown in a pool of craziness!  

Developing a time each day to spend in quiet reflection and prayer is the best remedy. This habit will bring us to a point in our lives where we will automatically know where to go and what to do about all sorts of dilemmas and troubles that currently hold us in a state of panic and confusion. 

Many women choose mornings before the day begins. Some of us who are not quite "rise with the birds" kind of people find mid-morning just as effective. Just be sure to "unplug" all the electronic distractions. The important thing is not necessarily the time or the amount of time, it is the One who we spend it with. It's true that the Bible is God's way of speaking to us and prayer is how we speak to God. Just be sure it's a two-way conversation! 

"Be still, and know that I am God!. . .Be still in the presence of the Lord, and wait patiently for him to act. Don't worry about evil people who prosper or fret about their wicked schemes" Psalm 46:10a; Psalm 37:7 NLT. 

Thorns and Thistles

Those of you who have that emerald green "thumb" are to be much congratulated! You know exactly which plants go together, what season to plant what, and seem to have a connection with all growing things. Unfortunately, in my world, I look at a plant sideways and it will die. My thumb is of the black variety!

Living in a small mountain "country" town, instead of a city, gives the advantage of all the greenery one could ever want. Lots of rain and a mild winter with a few snow days, makes it so easy to keep plants growing. 

Gardens Galore!

A friend who works miracles with plants, has turned her entire backyard into a garden! Various flowers and plants bloom at certain times of the year and thrive like crazy. Particularly, she is an expert with the gorgeous Iris varieties and belongs to the local Iris Club. She is an amazing woman! What a great passion for any of us to pursue.

It seems she never has problems with any of the unwanted kinds of plants aka weeds, thorns, and thistles. Surely that is because she works hard at keeping them out of her garden. They are prickly and can hurt when accidentally grabbed. They can also choke out the good plants.

The very first garden known was the one in Eden--home to Adam and Eve. It had to have been extraordinary and lush with plant life "bringing all good things in abundance" according to some experts. There was no pollution and environmental disasters as there are today. The LORD God made all sorts of trees grow up from the ground--trees that were beautiful and produced fruit.

Necessary Weeding

Then, as now, mistakes were made by humans. The lushness in Eden soon gave way to thorny pests that needed to be controlled while trying to keep the best intact. It is ironically reminisce of our everyday lives. We all make mistakes and are trying to do our best to "weed out" the bad and keep the good. 

Hydrangea Fall Favorite

Hundreds of centuries later, we have come far, but it hasn't been easy by any measure. In our own personal lives, we have made important steps into our future. Be encouraged with just those facts alone. Then realize we can keep it going with some planning, planting, and lots of prayers. After all, God is on our side and He will be there for each of us when we need Him. 

Giving up is not an option because who likes thorns and thistles anyway? Let's surround ourselves with the most beautiful flower garden out there! Hydrangeas anyone? 

The grasslands of the wilderness become a lush pasture, and the hillsides blossom with joy. Psalm 65:12

     

          

Collected In A Bottle

The movie, Message in a Bottle, was a tear-filled and bittersweet kind of story. At the same time, it was pretty amazing to find out that one person had actually collected their thoughts and love for another and kept them in a bottle! 

Digging in the Sand

Many of us still carry around fears, anxieties and pain. We find ourselves, sometimes, crying endless tears over things that are no longer of any benefit to us. How about today we dry our tears and dig into the sand of our future to find out Who really loves us?

There is an empty spot in our hearts, and, since our creation as newborn baby girls, it's been waiting to be filled. Every baby, female or male, has the same heart-spot. As much as our parents were able to provide our every single need and wish, that heart-spot was not theirs to fill.   

We Can Only Imagine

Our heart-spot is there because absolutely no one understands us better than God Himself. He is our Creator including that elusive heart-spot. He knows all about our fears, what makes us joyful, our anxieties and worries, and our thoughts even before we think them! 

He knows our physical qualities, like how many hairs are on our heads, how many times our heart beats and yes, how many tears we have shed. He cares so much about those tears, He collects them in a bottle and even writes down what caused them. Just close your eyes and imagine. Simply astonishing! This is the absolute truth. It can be verified in His book, the Bible.

Our heavenly Father knows exactly how to fill that empty heart-spot. He chose us to be His daughters--don't ever forget that love-filled fact. God is unlike any human father; His love is complete and unconditional. He anxiously waits for each of us to say "Yes!" to His invitation to come and live with Him forever. When we do, that empty heart-spot is instantly spirit-filled with so much love, we have only tears of joy.
     
You keep track of all my sorrows. You have collected all my tears in your bottle. You have recorded each one in your book. Psalm 56:8

Would You Rather Have Happiness or Joy?

Some people are so thrilled by road trips, they hop in their SUV or camper and head off to a new adventure, as if they have never traveled! There are those who plan weeks ahead exactly where and when they will go, and others who are so spontaneous they get an idea and just pick up and “Go.” Good for them!

There are approximately 2.7 million miles of paved roads in the United States. That is a lot of traveling to do without some kind of map and direction. Of course, we all know people who rather take the risk without one. Sometimes, they never get to where they are going. Sometimes they do, but get so sidetracked, it can take a lifetime of confusion and pain along the way. We’ve all taken a few of those side trips!

Many of us want to get to the place called Happiness (which is entirely different than the real town of Happy, TX, and the 1999 comedy movie of the same name). The location we are talking about here is a state of mind. It’s a feel-good emotion we all want to grab onto.

Happiness vs. Joy

Before we go any further, let’s just be clear. Many, many things or places will make us happy and that’s a good thing. No sad frowns here. But we need to realize, happiness is temporary. So what exactly makes us happy?

• Chocolate does it for most of us

• 

  Raindrops on Roses. . .

  The first spring bloom in our garden
• A good book on a sunny day on our porch
• Visiting an art gallery
• Going to the movies
• Raindrops and snowflakes
• Wiggling our toes in sand
• Our favorite song on the radio
• A good restaurant meal

On the other hand, when we experience joy, we know we have a permanent and wonderful gift. Something we never want to let go of and will cherish forever. Where do we find joy?

• The touch of a newborn baby
• Sunrises and sunsets
• Newfound faith
• The smell of rain approaching
• God’s love
• The voices of our children
• The peace of Jesus
• Family
• All the promised blessings of God

The Best Road Trip of All

Life is an exciting adventure, but we need to be aware of roadblocks and dangers along the way. A map is always handy to prevent getting stuck at a dead end. Thankfully, we have a Guide and an entire Book of Maps.

Even if it took a little while to get here, we can now abundantly bask in each and every stop on the way to Happiness via a little place called Joy and a Guide named Jesus.

You have shown me the way of life, and you will fill me with the joy of your presence. Acts 2:28

The Momentum Bucket List

In 2007 Hollywood produced the movie, The Bucket List, which was all at once humorous and insightful. Complete strangers found they must face who they really are and if they have accomplished all they wanted to in life before it's too late. They decided they needed a list of things to do that they had never gotten around to doing. This whole concept became very popular for many of us!

Now that we are on the way to reinventing our lives exactly the way we want, we encourage you to start a list of your own. It can be serious, silly, or simple. It might be something you've done before, but not in a very long time. Or it might be daring and adventurous (safety first though!). These might seem ridiculous to family and friends. But all that counts is this list is real and important to you--no one else. While you are thinking, let's have some fun. Remember there are different kinds of lists for different kinds of people. Try something you've never done before: 

Five Adventurous Bucket Gems

1. Jump out of an airplane on your next big birthday milestone. 
2. Rent a sailboat and travel to an island.
3. Stay at a B&B in an exotic location.  
4. Photograph elephants in the Serengeti National Park, Tanzania.
5. Go on an archaeological dig.  

Seven Encouraging Bucket Gems

1. Send yourself flowers.

2. Find two other single-again friends and take a crafty class together.
3. Sleep in the middle of the bed.
4. Eat dessert first before a meal.
5. Adopt a pet to love and enjoy (if you already have one, get another!)
6. Save up and buy a beautiful gemstone ring on Valentine's Day.
7. Rent a bicycle along the coast and see the sites. 

There are a million more things you can do. Keep thinking and you could create categories of bucket lists for yourself: a Bucket List for. . . home, career, health, travel, kids, budget, adventure, etc etc. Do different. Be different. You've got the idea. Keep the momentum going!

Thought to ponder: You were created to be creative by your Creator! He wants you to enjoy life to the fullest in whatever way suits your personality to show the world Who loves you! 

"The Lord formed me from the beginning, before he created anything else" Proverbs 8:22 NLT.  

 

The Quicksand of Life

No matter where we live on this amazing earth, each day only has 24 hours, as we well know. Once one day is gone, it’s gone forever. We can not repeat that day, as the present is already here. Creation was made that way, and in so doing, it gave us the chance to have a fresh start and begin again.

Most of us can wrap our housecoats around us and welcome a brand new day. It’s a refreshing time to greet the morning sunshine, grab our coffee or tea, and plan how we will spend our time. Thankfully, some of us have jobs to go to, classes to attend, kids to get off to school, or friends to meet for a workout and lunch. And as single-again women, we may have already discovered a new purpose for living in this world.

Quicksand Terror

The present is the ever moving shadow that divides yesterday from tomorrow. In that lies hope. --Frank Lloyd Wright

Sometimes, however, there are those of us who get side-tracked and fall into a hole. We long to just turn around and go back to yesterday. We want to have a “re-do” in some way. It pulls on us and deceives us into believing if we could just try again, we could make today go away. We are just not able to move on to the next day with ease.

Without some kind of personal “life line,” we are in danger of getting pulled into the quicksand of life. We can spend months or even years trying to struggle past what’s right in front of us. Why is that? It is because we believe we have lost all hope of ever having a good life again.

We can’t see how it is possible. Yet, if we swallow our pride and connect with people who are willing to help us through the rough part (and there are plenty), then we will find ways to do what we know we need to do--pack up the house, sell the furniture, get a new place to live or a new job--whatever it might be.

Shadows Are Ever Moving

If we have ever watched a sundial for any length of time, we can readily see that time never stands still. The shadow is always moving forward. Our lives can be wasted if we refuse to take part in today before it is gone. We know this to be true if we have ever slept through an entire day.   

So where can we find hope? Hope lives in a place with its companions, faith and love. Believers in the Lord Jesus Christ are centered in this same place. Therefore, developing a mature relationship with the Master of this world will automatically introduce us to the life God already planned for us a long time ago. We need only to answer His knock on our door. Just be prepared to share a meal with a new Friend!

Why am I discouraged? Why is my heart so sad? I will put my hope in God! I will praise him again--my Savior and my God! Psalm 42:11 (NLT)

“Look! I stand at the door and knock. If you hear my voice and open the door, I will come in, and we will share a meal together as friends. Revelation 3:20 (NLT)

What’s Working for You?

There are times when life gets going so fast that we rarely make the time to turn our heads for a moment and see where we came from and where we are going. Just one common example is the cell phone. There actually are nearly as many cell phones in the world (6.8 billion) as there are people in the world (7 billion)! That is more than the total number of landlines ever used.

According to one tracker, it’s easy to understand, “You don’t need a home to have one, and you don’t need a network that touches every building. It’s easier to plop a cell phone tower in a neighborhood than plug in every single building.” This makes sense, but cell phones have made us spin faster and faster until we almost get dizzy and fall over.  

Every now and then, though, it’s a good idea to slow down, look back, and do a friendly examination of ourselves. Especially with the mind-blowing situation we just survived. It took every bit of toughness, strength, and resilience we had in our bodies to get right here and right now. If we don’t want to repeat all that, it’s to our own advantage to review every now and then how much we have achieved. We do it in our jobs once a year, so why not in our personal lives too?

There are two ways to contrast how we are doing--what didn’t work before and what is working after:

  

Wide-Eyed Wishing

Many of us were perhaps too young when we married the first time. We didn’t take our time to get to know the one we said “I do!” to, nor even to make life-plans that involved both of us. We, most likely, lacked the experience we needed to deal with and avoid repeated scenes that caused us damage and destruction. Honestly, we really had no idea what we were doing. Eventually, because of our innocence, we lost ourselves in a pool of nothingness. We lived a “half-life” never developing our own talents and abilities. Thankfully, we eventually gained insight and found the strength we needed to make better decisions.   

Wiser Women

Learning from past circumstances, we have been able to choose new goals and habits that uplift our “fully-developed lives.” Our hearts spill over with joy just creating a whole new way to live. Enthusiasm goes a long way. Sure, not every single day goes smoothly, no one said it would. This is real life. It gets hard sometimes for all of us. We are not alone in this truth. The key is how we respond to all the messiness. We each have to decide what that looks like for our own lives. Not for our friend’s life, not for our sister’s, brother’s, or mother’s life, but what positive thing we do when life gets us down. It’s all about making the wise choice. The thing is with all the confidence we now have (and it will increase every day), we know we can survive at least the next 24 hours!

Joy for Your Journey

Wiser words have never been spoken than in the first nine chapters of the Book of Proverbs. We use those as a guide to weigh how our lives are going. If we haven’t quite reached the point where we want our lives to be, studying and meditating on these words of God will make it very clear what we need to do.

If we are beginning to find satisfaction with our journey, sustaining true wisdom for the “long haul” can be discovered through these chapters in Proverbs. They will direct us in knowing God better and what He sees for our future. It is His heart for our heart!

“As a face is reflected in water, so the heart reflects the real person” Proverbs 27:19 NLT.

How Is Your Heart Doing Now?

Here’s some thought-provoking questions for today: why do we all enjoy music so much? What exactly does it do to us? Most people would say because it makes them happy. And that is certainly true. But why? Probably because music is upbeat, inspirational, or makes us want to move to the beat.

But deeper than that, it is because nearly every single piece of music or song is about love. Have we ever heard of music that spews hate? Not very likely. Who would listen to or buy that kind of music? Of course, someone may have heard some pretty bad and distasteful lyrics once upon a time, but it is not the cultural norm by any means. It is not uplifting. It doesn’t make one want to scan their playlist or turn the radio on in the car.

Bringing Out Our Best

We know love has certain qualities we all want to experience. Like patience, kindness, hope, trust, and protection. What we don’t want is anyone in our life that acts with envy, rudeness, selfish pride, and anger. Unlike hatred and an unforgiving nature, love always brings out our best.

In our previous relationship, particularly towards the end, we probably suffered enough hatred on both sides to last a lifetime. It affected everyone; our spouse, our children, our extended family, friends and, of course, ourselves. Hopefully, we have given ourselves enough space and time to physically move on. But we may still be feeling the emotional pain. We now need to give ourselves a break from all that hostility and hatred.

Sometimes, the anger that remains is there because we haven’t given ourselves the gift of forgiveness by forgiving him. Remember, forgiveness is not condoning what he did. It’s not saying it was o.k. to act that way. It’s just acknowledging the person for who he is, accepting that a person is able to change with or without our input, and extending love above our own feelings.

Forgiveness is for us. When we choose to act with love and kindness, we will avoid more and more hatred. Our heart will begin to heal and won’t continually be wounded over and over. We will catapult into a life of happiness, joy, and love. And then, we can experience love in the future without any residual effects from a previous relationship.

What Can We Do Now?

Learning to love with forgiveness in our pockets expands into all our other relationships. Is the world not experiencing this lack of love right now? What would happen if we gave our neighbors, co-workers, and relatives the benefit of the doubt? How would it change things if we stopped and found out what is going on in their world? We might be shocked. It might even break our selfish hearts. Who is for a little peace and harmony?

"Hatred stirs up quarrels, but love makes up for all offenses" Proverbs 10:12 NLT.

"Love is patient and kind. Love is not jealous or boastful or proud or rude. It does not demand its own way. It is not irritable, and it keeps no record of being wronged. It does not rejoice about injustice but rejoices whenever the truth wins out. Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance" 1 Corinthians 13:4-7 NLT.